


The Truth

by cristina_lore



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: After Shiro gets back and Matt is presumably with them, But it's not about Pidge in any way, F/M, Gen, Hmm..., I'd say this takes place in Season 3, It takes place in the same universe, Overdue Talks, Post-Season/Series 02, SINCE FINDING OUT ABOUT KEITH'S GALRA BLOOD, Should I include this in the Pidge Story series?, THEY ALL FINALLY HAVE THE TALK THEY SHOULD HAVE HAD, The Shallura is actually more up to interpretation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-29
Updated: 2017-06-29
Packaged: 2018-11-20 22:59:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,580
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11344869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cristina_lore/pseuds/cristina_lore
Summary: Allura and Shiro have a long, overdue talk that is centered around Keith being part Galra, but is really about lingering guilt, validating feelings, and apologies. Coran joins in as well.Basically, a little honesty really does go a long way.





	The Truth

**Author's Note:**

> This is my fic for fairylaughing on tumblr, for Voltron Positivity Day. That was on the 20th of this month, so this is long overdue, just like the conversation that happens in this fic.
> 
> Basically I was left feeling really frustrated on how things were handled with Allura and Keith, so I thought that this would be a plausible conversation that could and should happen sometime in the future.
> 
> fairylaughing asked for Shallura, but I suck at romance. Hopefully the intimacy, comfort, and trust I tried to sprinkle throughout the story is more than enough.
> 
> Please leave comments, I beg.

_She knows the truth can cause a sharp pain behind your eyes and that love sometimes feels like a fist around your throat. - Keeping Faith, Jodi Picoult_

 

Sometimes, when everyone was asleep - or supposed to be asleep - she liked to look up at the stars and remember. Remember what it was like to actually be a princess, not just hold the title. Or the way things were before Zarkon had betrayed them, when her father was quick with a smile and a story from his childhood that she was certain was only half true.  
  
Allura sighed. She didn't know how much longer she could keep this up. A rebellion wasn't meant to be led by a girl half forgotten by the universe, especially not with a team like hers. Oh, they had proven themselves time and time again, but they were all so _young_ . Too young to be fighting Haggar and Lotor, in any case.  
  
"Princess?"  
  
Allura straightened -when had she started to slump? - and whirled around in one fluid motion. Shiro looked mildly impressed but made no comment, instead choosing to walk closer and wait for her to speak, a concerned look on his face.  
  
When she didn't say anything, he prodded her once more. "Allura? What's wrong?"

"I - shouldn't you be getting your sleep, Shiro? As a paladin of Voltron, not to mention all you've been through -"

"Allura."

She stopped short. Sometimes she forgot that she and Coran weren't the only adults on this ship, who knew leadership and responsibility backwards, forwards, and sideways. It would be a little easier if it were true though. She'd be able to derail conversations, in any case.  
  
"I -" She looked down, away from Shiro's expectant yet compassionate look. Quiznak, she was finally seeing why Pidge and Lance joked about him being a dad.  
  
"It's Keith!"  
  
She was immediately horrified. She hadn't meant to say that. It was just the first thing that popped out, for lack of words to describe everything she was thinking and feeling. She couldn't possibly still be bothered by that whole business.  
  
Could she?  
  
She chanced a look at him. His eyebrows were up, but he didn't look anywhere near as caught off guard as she felt. Then again, it was Shiro. He was maddeningly, sometimes frighteningly, good at keeping a serene facade. 

Or maybe he was just trying to keep that strange fatherly look on his face. It didn't suit him, at least not when it was directed at her.

Nevertheless, she answered to it. "I will explain, but only if you stop looking at me like that. It's not becoming."  
  
Before he could ask, she elaborated, "With that _expression_ . I am not one of the young paladins. I am not a child,  nor am I your 'baby sister'.  I am your leader and commander, and I expect to be treated as such."  
  
Said expression melted into one of sympathy and understanding.  
  
" You're right. I'm sorry, Princess."  
  
Allura exhaled profusely. "It's alright, as long as it doesn't happen again." She felt the need to continue. "And you can still call me Allura, if you wish. That hasn't, nor  will it change."  
  
A smile graced his face. "Thank you. Allura."  
  
She nodded in acknowledgement, half hoping the semi lecture was enough to make all previous conversation forgotten.  
  
"So...what did you mean by 'It's Keith'?"  
  
No such luck.

Allura fought the urge to groan. She certainly didn’t owe him an explanation, but...maybe it was best to let it all out. No matter how annoying and frankly, embarrassing, it was.

“I’m not - still angry, if that’s what you’re thinking. Or scared, really. Maybe a little cautious, and sometimes I still get caught off my guard, but I suppose that is to be expected.”

Shiro nodded. “Of course.”

“And it’s not still constantly on my mind. Keith being Galra isn’t something to which I’m devoting time.”

“But...something to do with Keith _is_. Something you devote time to.”

Allura huffed, looking away.. He was right, and she felt like a fool for not pinpointing the feeling behind her vague discomfort around Keith sooner.

“I know...that it’s natural to still feel wary around him. And I apologized for the way I acted, and I meant it. But I still feel...ashamed. Guilty.”

Tears welled up and she blinked them back. It was so quiznacking stupid to get worked up over this, she knew that, but it didn’t mean all the terrible feelings went away. What must Shiro think about this...this  _ display _ ?

Her eyes cut to his face, widening when she saw the strange expression on it: eyebrows furrowed, eyes sad, lower lip bitten and held in a downward tilt on one side. What could he be thinking? Why wasn’t he saying anything?

The silence grew unbearable. “My father taught me to be a diplomat, I was raised learning that peace, knowledge, and alliances were the backbone of Altean society. I lived by that back then, and I’ve lived by it in this war. And -”

A choked off sob burst out, made unnaturally loud by the subconscious awareness that the other inhabitants of the castle were at rest.

She composed herself and continued, holding up a hand to preemptively warn off Shiro’s comforting hand. “I did not live by it with Keith. With a - a boy who’s only family appears to be you. How could I do that to him? To the memory of Altea?”

Tears streamed down her face, her hands coming up to swipe them away as she tried to keep her weeping silent. Hands came up to her shoulders in an uncertain attempt to be soothing.

“Hey. Princess. Allura. Look at me.”

She looked up to see Shiro’s face inches from hers, his shoulders hunched as he tried to bend down to her level. She took a shuddering breath.

“What?”

He hesitated, apparently not knowing where to start now that he had to do the talking. He sighed and dropped his hands, leaving her with a slight chill. The look he gave her immediately afterwards though, soft and open with an uncertain twist to his mouth, warmed her. That look meant understanding. Trust.

“I can’t tell you to not feel guilty, because it doesn’t work like that. What I can tell you is what I think you already know: that this anger you’re feeling towards yourself is irrational.”

She opened her mouth to protest, only to be cut off.

“It’s my turn to talk, Princess. And I want you to really listen.”

Her mouth shut. Diplomacy, after all, was about knowing when to simply pay attention.

“I know you feel like you’ve betrayed your principles. Your morals. I know because...because I sometimes still feel the same way. About when I was The Champion. I did what I had to do to survive. And yet…” His eyes glazed over as he remembered what he had been forced to endure. A light touch to his hand was all it took for him to continue. His forefinger held onto hers.

“What I’m trying to say is, I know that anyone would have done the same in my place, maybe even worse. But still, it’s hard not to think about how maybe if I had done one thing differently, more people could have been saved. If I had moved more slowly at a certain moment, complied more quickly when we were captured, when we had to fight...if I had not chosen to save the life of my friend...maybe that could have made a difference. A good difference.”

He inhaled and exhaled slowly. “If I had had a different mindset, different thoughts running through my head, maybe I could have saved more lives. And I know it’s irrational. Not smart, to say the least. But it doesn’t stop me from wondering.” He chuckled softly and smiled. “I’m assuming it’s the same with you.”

She lowered her head, whispering her agreement. It felt slightly wrong.

“My point is, it’s not fair to blame yourself for your feelings. Completely valid feelings. Zarkon betrayed you, the Galra allied with him, they killed your people and your father. And you woke up after ten thousand years to discover that they’d taken over a good portion of the universe. Zarkon and his allies are not good people. You have every right not to trust any Galra. And...you had a right to be alarmed and confused when you found out Keith was part Galra.”

“But -”

“And I wanted to say I’m sorry.”

Allura gaped at him. What did he have to be sorry for?

“I’m sorry that I never tried to talk to you. I could see what you were going through, what Keith was going through, and I just...didn’t say anything. I told myself it would all work out eventually, because you’re a princess, and Keith can handle himself. But it was an excuse. I didn’t want to have that conversation, plain and simple. Just the thought of it was tiring.”

Allura stared. She had never thought of that. She had had the vague feeling that she wished she could talk to someone about Keith’s heritage, but she just...ignored it. There had been a rather obvious crisis bigger than her own to deal with.

“Coran and I are both adults. We should have handled the situation like adults, and I didn’t, and I’m willing to bet he didn’t either. Or did he try to talk to you about it?”

She shook her head. All her conversations with Coran had consisted of motivation for the mission, doubts about the mission, the mission, the mission, the mission. Maybe he had also been relieved not to have that conversation?

The thought hurt a little.

“We both should have talked to you, helped you sort everything out. We both took the easy out -”

Something occured to her. “Yes,” she interrupted, “I understand, and that is all very well and good, but that doesn’t change the fact that the way I treated Keith was wrong. I all but cast him out! Maybe I would have, if he wasn’t a paladin!”

Shiro flinched slightly, and she regretted her outburst. Probably not the best idea to mention that you would have gladly kicked out someone’s surrogate family.

He composed himself, and his next words were spoken quietly and steadily, though not without power.

“I’m not saying your actions were right or commendable. I am saying that the feelings behind your actions were - and still are - understandable, and that Coran and I should have been there for you. I’m sorry we weren’t.”

She didn’t know what to say. What was there  _ to _ say? Before she could formulate a response, another voice rang out.

“He’s right, Allura.”

Both she and Shiro turned towards the doorway, finding Coran standing straight and tall, his calm image ruined by the way two fingers tugged at his mustache.

In the back of her mind, there was a slight tug, a want to try to placate him with kind words and reassurances. But once again, maybe it was time to simply listen.

“I didn’t think - no, I didn’t want it to be the appropriate time to talk about it. I knew you thought planning our final move against Zarkon was of the greatest importance, and I was relieved. I was having my own trouble coming to terms with Keith’s bloodline, and I’m ashamed to say I thought it was enough to just not outwardly show it. To continue as things were. That was a disservice to you  _ and _ me.”

Allura could feel herself start to panic. The words they were saying made some sort of sense, but her mind could not compute them, could not get past the fact that she was a leader too and should have known better. She should have been like Coran, putting the whole situation on the back burner, as the paladins would say. Why couldn’t she have done that? Why couldn’t she have seen past her feelings like the  _ reasonable adult she was supposed to be _ ?

“Allura.” Two gentle voices brought her out of her head. Shiro and Coran looked half worried and half sympathetic, something that simultaneously bothered and comforted her. The comfort was winning out.

The two took in her wide eyes and trembling lips. They glanced at each other, having a quick, silent conversation before turning back to her. Coran took her hands in his.

“Maybe having that talk, or multiple talks, with you wasn’t our duty or obligation.” Quiznak, how did he always read her mind like that? Ever since she was a little girl, she sometimes felt like it was better to turn to Coran than to her father. He understood her like no one else could.

“But it doesn’t mean it wasn’t the best action to take. It was the right thing to do, regardless of whether you’re the leader here or not. We lost sight of how young you still are -and don’t try to protest that. At times it feels like even I’m too young for all this, and I’ve already had a case of the slipperies!”

A wet laugh escaped her, while Coran let a grin take over his face. Shiro looked on, making a  _ go on _ gesture when Coran glanced at him. His face grew somber once again.

“It wasn’t Shiro’s responsibility to take care of you, even if he is the third adult here, and a leader in his own right. But, in a way, it  _ was _ mine. I lived through the same thing you did, I am the one who can understand what you’re going through the most, if not completely. And! I have been taking care of you your whole life! This shouldn’t have been such a hardship.”

His hands tightened on hers. "Allura...I know I can never replace Alfor, and I don't want to. But I've always seen myself as a father figure to you and-"    
  
He gulped and took a tremulous breath, "I haven't been the best one lately. I’m sorry.”

In the next half-tick, Coran was nearly bowled over by the force of Allura’s hug. 

“Coran, you must know that you’ve always been a second father to me. That has never changed, and will never change. You have always been there for me, through my best and worst. I think I can forgive the one instance you felt like you couldn’t. For all your talk of valid feelings and correct courses of action, you forget that you count too. I should have opened up to you too.”

She raised her head from where it was buried in Coran’s shoulder to half glare at Shiro. “That also goes for you.”

Shiro put his arms up, accepting the reprimand with a wry grin. When Allura turned her body and lifted one arm to open the hug to him, he took the opportunity. For a few ticks, there was nothing but silence as the three held each other tightly, reluctant to let go.

Finally, Coran broke the hug. “Well,” he said, wiping a few stray tears away, “it is time for bed for this strapping young man. I’ll see you both at breakfast.” He smiled at them. “Make sure to get some rest, you two.”

He walked towards the exit, stopping when he heard Allura call out his name.

“I love you, you know. I don’t know if I’ve ever said it, but I do.”

He laughed. “Of course I know. Just like you know that I love you too. Good night, little warrior.” He exited with a jaunty wave.

Shiro turned to her. “Little warrior?”

Allura grinned sheepishly. “I’m told I’m a lot like my mother. Wanting to be peaceful but always ready to duel for anyone’s honor.”

“Fairly accurate.”

She laughed, taking in his face. He really was a good man. Someone she could always count on.

“I’ve had a few talks with Keith,” he said after a short silence. “I think you should know he also feels guilty.”

“For what?”

Shiro gave her a look. “If trying to be a big brother to you doesn’t suit me, playing at being clueless definitely doesn’t suit you. He told me what he said. How he argued with you, someone who’s had more experience with this situation than the paladins, on the morality of the Galra.”

“Well, yes, he did do that, and it was frustrating, but he wasn’t exactly incorrect, was he?”

“That’s not the point here. The point is that he dismissed all your experiences and feelings, all your turmoil, and never once apologized for it. You know that’s not right. Or healthy to your relationship, for that matter.”

He sighed. A distant part of her noted that he was doing that a lot in this talk of theirs. She couldn’t blame him. She knew he was right, but it wasn’t so easy to let go of guilt.

"Keith is usually straightforward, and he's told me that he does want to apologize for what he did. He knows that he was also in the wrong." He shook his head and smiled. "He said that he was so busy trying to feel like he wasn't being invalidated that he ended up doing it to you."    
  
Allura raised a brow, and Shiro's smile widened.   
  
"It was basically what he said, just...less eloquently."   
  
She bit back a grin. That sounded more like Keith.   
  
"Like I said, he's usually pretty upfront and he knows he wasn't blameless. And though I’ve tried to tell him that he just needs to talk to you, he...doesn't want to make you uncomfortable again."   
  
Allura sobered, her eyebrows furrowing. "You mean he doesn't want to feel like he's lost me again. Like his family is gone again."   


"To an extent." There was a pause, and then yet another deep sigh. "You can't let that get you to let him off the hook, or brush everything under the rug. His feelings are valid, and understandable, but so are yours. It doesn't mean he was - or is - completely right  _ or _ wrong. Just like you. You two are really similar, now that I think about it."

Allura scoffed. Keith was a only a young boy, and while she wasn’t significantly older, she  _ was _ still older than him, and much more patient and level headed.

“No it’s true! I told him to talk to you, but I haven’t pushed the issue as much as I could have. I thought that giving him time would be the best thing to do, but that’s the same mistake I made with you.”

Her shoulders slumped. Yet again, he was right.

“You’re right. You have an annoying tendency to do that, you know. As your Princess, I command you to stop.”

Her pout immediately crumbled when she heard him laughing. She couldn’t help but chuckle along with him, briefly leaning against him as the moment went from serious and somewhat sad to light hearted and sweet.

“Thank you, Shiro. For...all this. I needed to hear what you said, what Coran said, and...I guess I needed you both to hear what I had to say as well.”

“It wasn’t any trouble at all. It was what should have happened since the beginning. And if you ever need to talk again, I’m here for you.”

“Only if you know the same goes for you.” She held out a hand, arching an eyebrow as she asked, “Do we have a deal?”

He took her hand and shook it once, then used it to pull her into a hug. “Yes. Thank you, Princess.”

Of course, it was Shiro, and she shouldn’t have expected him to let that be the end of it.

“Things will work out with Keith, too, I’m sure of it. You two could be really good friends.”

Allura couldn’t help but start to giggle. He was incorrigible in the most caring way. The thought made her hug him more tightly. Shiro was solid and warm, something that had made her recognize him as a fellow leader, and now something she realized she could take comfort in. Allura buried her face into his shoulder for a bit before pulling back and saying, "I suppose I should go talk to him again."

Shiro laughed. "You and I both know that that wouldn't do any good in the long run. You already apologized. Now it's his turn. Let him come to you."   
  
Before she could open her mouth, he added, "He will. Trust me. There are Ways."   
  
Allura laughed, and then tugged him close again to hide the fact that she was trying to blink back tears.  _ Ways _ , he said, fondness and mischief in his tone. She knew of those Ways, had employed them on cousins and friends so close they could have been family.   
  
Arms tightened around her waist, and she let some tears fall. A strange kind of relief filled her, and for the first time since she woke up in that pod, she felt that bone deep certainty that told her everything would turn out alright.

 

_ You would think I’d have been scared. But I could hear my mother, telling me a story...about a coyote who wanted to capture the sun. He climbed the tallest tree, and he put it in a jar and brought it home. That jar, though, it couldn’t hold something so strong, and it burst.  _ **_See?_ ** _...my mother had said.  _ **_You are filled with light._ ** _ \- Handle with Care, Jodi Picoult _

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading what was basically a vent post lmao.
> 
> Also I've decided to make this part of the Pidge Story, because this will inevitably tie in to something else later.


End file.
